I’m being dramatic. But I’m really frustrated.
On Saturday, I decided to go swimsuit shopping. I had a gift card to one store and a merchandise credit to another store and was wanting to go lay out at the local park for a while. So I went on a mission to find a swimsuit that would look good on me and work well with my pump. I do a lot of laying out and squirting water at my dogs, more just hanging out than actual swimming, so a suit that goes well with my pump is kind of essential. Plus, I use the Animas Ping, which is supposed to be completely waterproof. *crosses fingers*
The first suit I tried on was a one piece that had enough room to place the pump in the top half, but looked kind of ridiculous with its little fluffy skirt thing. Plus it was strapless, which in my mind was just spelling disaster for swimsuit. Second, I tried on several tankini tops. One of them kind of looked good on the top, but it wasn’t doing much for camouflaging my stomach the way my favorite swimsuits have. If I could find a one piece that fit me on top the way that one did, I would buy it, pump or no pump. But I couldn’t bring myself to spend money on a swimsuit that I was only half satisfied with. I finally tried on a one piece that I just loved and considered buying, but the way it was cut left nowhere to put my pump and I just couldn’t buy it knowing I couldn’t wear it without shorts.
I guess the reason I got so upset wasn’t really about swimsuit shopping. I can usually find one that looks good (seriously, I love one pieces) fairly quickly because I know exactly what style looks good on my body type and I know what I don’t like. But knowing that that style wouldn’t allow me to keep my pump on me while wearing it unless I was wearing shorts really frustrated me. I was frustrated with diabetes, with my weight, and with life in general. Plus it was really, really hot in the fitting room which was also frustrating me.
It’s almost enough to say, “GET THIS PUMP OFF ME” and go on a tube-pulling rampage.
Then I remember that my A1C has dropped .8% since I started pumping. And no ripping out occurs.
Just wait til my first weekend at the lake. Then we will see.